Life in modern society often demands an extraordinary management of our time. Especially for impending parents, the prospect of determining how best to adjust one's schedule to include adequately (dare I say,
exceptionally) caring for a new human may be daunting.
So what does a baby caring routine actually entail, broken down to the nitty gritty? I will share some sample routines that I've found helpful for planning around. I included a couple
in a previous post related to bedtime routines, but
here is the original Basic Routine that pretty much covers what we did with our kids in their first two months of life:
0-2 months (start every 3 hrs - or more frequently if your pediatrician deems it necessary)
Get & warm/prep bottle, or prep for breast feeding: 2-5 min
Feed: 10-30
Burp & hold upright: 15
Change diaper: 3
Swaddle if sleepy: +2
Breast pump if desired: +22
Wash dishes if needed: 0-15
Total: ~30-68 min +24
What are we looking at here? For each schedule, it starts with the approximate age followed by when to implement it. Then each line is a separate task with an average length of time it takes to complete it; sometimes there is a range if it depends on the day or circumstance, other times there is a set additional time if some condition is met. By the end, I include the rough total amount of time to complete the routine. Below, I split these routines into Basic, Morning, and Bedtime, and for each will try to highlight the major differences as the child grows older. I've included up to around age one to best illustrate these changes over time.
Naturally, this is highly dependent on your own child and your own parenting preferences. It also obviously does not include those in-between moments where you're spending quality time with your child, or when you're helping them to calm down; luckily, in our experience most of the in-between time in the first couple months will be taken up by sleep. Having said that, you might find this exercise helpful in shaping the pieces to fit the puzzle that is your ideal daily/weekly schedule (or unschedule) as a parent. Then when you encounter inevitable issues with specific tasks in a routine (i.e. your baby has trouble latching or burping), you can continue to tweak time averages, task orders, or even break the task into subtasks, with an ever-increasing understanding of how baby's routines fit into the rest of your obligations. If you're wondering, yes of course I have the equivalent for all of my own routines as well. It helps me to plan my schedule so that I know I'm allowing enough time to do the things I have decided I want to do, with the intention that it will leave me open to living in that Moment and not worrying about "do I have enough time for this."
Basic Routine
~2-6 months, daytime (start when sleep training)
Get & warm/prep bottle, or prep for breast feeding: 2-5 min
Feed: 10-20
Burp & hold upright: 10-15
Change diaper: 3
Wash dishes if needed: 0-15
Total: ~25-58 min
~2-6 months, overnight (start when sleep training)
Get & warm/prep bottle, or prep for breast feeding: 2-5 min
Feed: 5-20
Burp & hold upright: 10-15
Change diaper: 3
Swing (if not sleepy): 0-10
Swaddle: 2
Total: ~22-55 min
~6-12 months, daytime (start when feeding hard food)
Get and prep mush/solid food: 3 min
Feed mush/solid food: 15
Get & warm/prep bottle: 2
Feed bottle & burp: 10-15
Change diaper: 3
Wash dishes if needed: 0-15
Total: ~33-53 min
Morning Routine
~2-6 months (start when sleep training)
Get & warm/prep bottle, or prep for breast feeding: 2-5 min
Feed: 10-20
Burp & hold upright: 10-15
Change diaper: 3
Wash face with cool wash cloth: 2
Change clothes for day: 3
Exercise/play time: 5
Total: ~35-53 min
~6-12 months (start when feeding hard food)
Get & warm/prep bottle: 2 min
Feed bottle & burp: 10-15
Change diaper: 3
Wash face with cool wash cloth: 2
Brush "teeth": 2
Change clothes for day: 3
Exercise/play time: 5
Total: ~27-32 min
Bedtime Routine
~2-6 months (start when sleep training)
Prep bath if necessary: +5 min
Get & warm/prep bottle, or prep for breast feeding: 2-5 min
(non-bath night) Wash face with warm wash cloth & change diaper OR (bath night) bath & lotion & brush hair: 5-15
Change into PJs: 3
Feed: 10-12
Burp & hold: 15
Read book: 5
Swing if necessary: +10
Total: ~40-55 +15 min
~6-12 months (start when feeding hard food)
Prep bath if necessary: +5 min
Get and warm/prep bottle: 2
(non-bath night) Wash face with warm wash cloth & change diaper OR (bath night) bath & lotion & brush hair: 5-15
Brush "teeth": 2
Change into PJs: 3
Feed bottle & burp: 10-15
Read book: 5
Spend time if awake: 0-15
Total: ~27-57 min +5
The only "time" that actually exists is the present Moment. The past is in our memories, and the future is in our imagination and plans. In reality, only thoughts about the past and future exist in this Moment. Getting overwhelmed by your potential schedule in the future is, in part, a fallacy of attempting to experience doing all of that at once. When you're with your child, perhaps it is best to remember that the only thing that is important is the task you're engaged in with her at this Moment; size that opportunity, and be present enough to enjoy it.
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